A skeptic sees the light

In April 2017, I did not believe in god, in any religion.

I was in Madison visiting twins, Byer and Zoryg. The visit was supposed to have been over; I was at a graduation party or something at my family friends’ house. Then, Byer texted me and told me that they’d gotten “acid,” the drug more commonly known as LSD. I was excited – I’d done acid in the past and loved every second of it. To the dismay of my parents, I got Byer to pick me up from the family party.

We took the acid, went outside, and ran. In the rain and the dark and in the commotion and the excitement, I forgot I was on acid. Suddenly, I felt a connection to something that wasn’t material. I can’t explain it in words, at least not in this language. Maybe my third eye opened, but I was unprepared and suddenly became afraid for my life. In a panic, I blurted out “I’m gonna call the cops!”

Byer whispered loudly, “You’re on acid Madi,” and I calmed down for a second, but, they still ran away from me. I was running after my friends in the dark and pouring rain when it happened.

Brilliant, beautiful, blinding white light filled up every centimeter of my entire vision, and I felt this beautiful unconditional love, but only for an instant. As suddenly as it had appeared, it vanished. I stopped running and stood there, panting with my hands on my knees – I was flabbergasted and unsure what I’d just seen. I spent the rest of my trip alone watching the walls melt in the entryway to some frathouse.

That night, when Zoryg and I were laying in our beds in the dark. I knew a priori that in the past he had done much more acid than I had done that night. Like, cubes of acid is how he had described it to me, so I expected him to have seen something. I described to Zoryg what I saw during my acid trip and asked if he had ever seen anything like it.

“No,” he said, his voice a little higher than it should be.